For Sale: Ford Car

For Sale Ford Car
10 February 1923

One Ford Car with a piston ring,
Two rear wheels, one front spring,
Has no fenders, seat or plank,
Burns much gas and hard to crank.

Carburettor’s busted halfway through,
Engine’s missing, hit in two.
Three years old, four in the spring.
Shock absorbers, ‘n’ everything.

Radiator’s busted, sure does leak;
Ten spokes missing, front all bent;
Tyres blown out, ‘taint worth a cent.

Got lots of speed, runs like the deuce,
Burns either gas or tobacco juice.
Tyres all off; been run on the rim,
But it’s a darn good Ford for the shape it’s in.

Reply to ‘For Sale, Ford Car.’
by Ford Crank – 15 February 1923

That Ford car for sale, only fit for the dump,
Must surely be owned by a bit of a chump.
To run a Ford car and make it so bad,
Must plainly imply that the owner is mad.

Ford cars are intended for use, not abuse;
But they were never intended to be run by a goose.
They are made to stand firmly much rough wear and tear,
And they beat many others at ‘getting you there’.

But to treat them as stated by your advertiser,
Will make a man poorer, if not any wiser.
Last week in Leamington this rhyming writer,
Met a Ford car driven by such a blighter.

His speed was not 20 m.p.h., but double;
The donkey was certainly looking for trouble.
I should not have been in the least bit surprised,
If when rounding a corner the car was capsized.
Then again you would advertise ‘Ford Car to Sell’.
With a Coroner’s inquest reported as well.

I am not a Ford agent, but drive a Ford car,
And I know how reliable ‘Tin Lizzies’ are.
You may run them for years with but little expense,
If you’ve benzine and oil and just plain common sense.